


Groove Crusading

by oldrussiancaptainsteve



Category: TWRP | Tupper Ware Remix Party (Band)
Genre: (But it's funk and i didn't really go into it), Part of the TWRP Big Bang!, Some Drug Use, Sung is an optimist, TWRP Big Bang, and just a little stupid, but that's why we love him, little bit of violence, twbb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 05:07:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19823182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oldrussiancaptainsteve/pseuds/oldrussiancaptainsteve
Summary: TWRP had disbanded, but the good doctor would like a reunion.





	1. The Wandering Hero and the Murderous Robots

The Earth had gone to shit.

It was slow gnawing that TWRP had fought hard to prevent, but in the end, it was the rich who had won the fight. They gutted the planet for profit while billions suffered, and when no more could be taken, they retreated into their towers and never came out.

TWRP had quickly disbanded long ago, much to the opposal of Sung. But the apocalypse had driven them apart, and with no way off-planet, they had to look for new destinies.  
Phobos was the first to leave the group. He’d been on a dying planet before, and he would find a new home once again. He would not let his people die yet. Phobos leaving made Meouch realize maybe there was no hope for TWRP after all. But, before TWRP, he had another profession, and surely he’d have a market in the apocalypse. Havve and Sung stayed together the longest, neither willing to give up. But one morning, Sung had woken up, and there was no sign of Havve except for fresh footprints in the sand.

Doctor Sung refused to give up. Just because his beloved Pale Blue Dot had been transformed into a Dull Brown Landfill, it didn't mean it couldn't be returned back to its former beauty! Although to do that, it would take some work, and unfortunately, it seemed like he was the only one who was willing to do it. Well! Sung had done the impossible before, why not do it again? And his big step one would take place today! Until now, Sung had acted as a wandering helper. If one of the few communities needed help, he would help them, whether it was finding food and water, or taking down any bullies that had bothered them. But soon he realized, while he had been helping greatly in the short term, no one of this would matter in the long term. That's what brought him to the monolithic black tower before him.

Havve had always wanted to fight back, not to just help who was left. He told Sung that those who did this deserved to pay, but Sung always thought that it was better to help than to seek revenge. But today, he would finally take the robot's advice.

Doctor Sung entered the front door of the tower.

The first thing he noticed was the air conditioning.

Outside it was hot and dry, a cold day being 90 degrees. In here, it was a crisp 67 degrees. He hadn’t been this cool in years (Literally of course, figuratively he thought he was cooler than ever).

After the surprise of the air conditioning, Sung noticed the rest of the room. It looked like a waiting room. Along the walls chairs were set up, interspersed with tables holding magazines. At the corner of the room was a door with a “Now Serving” screen above it. Immediately right of Sung was a “Take a Number” dispenser. But at the back of the room! There was a rock fountain. A beautifully sculpted piece that flowed with clean water. Sung ran to the fountain and knelt down to take a drink.

“DRINKING FROM FOUNTAINS IS PROHIBITED.”

Sung looked up to see a turret that had folded out the wall.

“STATE YOUR EMPLOYEE NUMBER.”

“Oh, uh, 1?”

“ZERO BLANK ONE IS INVALID. PREPARE FOR ERADICATION.”

By the time the turret had started to unload its bullets, Sung had time to hide behind a magazine table.  
“shitshitshitshitshit”  
“ORANGE OBJECT SIGHTED BEHIND TABLE. PROFILE MATCH. FIRING”  
“FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK”  
Sung laid down and kicked the table at the turret to buy some time.

While the turret targeted the flying magazines, Sung had the time to reach the chairs and began hurling them at the turret.

After many thrown chairs, the turret eventually stopped shooting.

“Ah ha! Success number one! Onwards and upwards!”

Sung walked to the door in the corner and collided with it.

“oooow yeah. Yup. This is not an automatic door.”

Sung looked up at the screen above the door.

It read: “Now Serving 97”

He then went to the number dispenser. The ticket read 12.

*Ding!* “Now Serving 98”

After much furious pulling, Sung had gotten ticket 99 right as he heard the next *Ding!*. He held his ticket up, and the doors opened before him to reveal an elevator.

“Yes! Success number 3 secured!”

As Sung rode the elevator up, he couldn't help but think of Havve Hogan. He heard rumors of a ghostly figure with piercing red eyes that had no mercy on anything that dared crossed it. And then one day it disappeared into one of the black towers, never to be seen again. It was this tower that Sung now found himself in, hoping to be reunited with one of his best friends.

*Ding!*

As the doors opened, Sung realized maybe he didn't think out his plan super well.

The elevator had put Sung in the middle of what looked like a board meeting, and behind the head of the table in a display case, was the strung up form of Havve Hogan, eyes dim.  
After a moment of awkward silence, the head of the table stood. He was old and wrinkled, his skin hanging off of his body. His voice was raspy. 

“Doctor Sung?”

“...Yeah?”

“What is your purpose here?”

“Rescue my friend and stop whatever you weirdos are doing.”

“Ah.” The Head sat back down. “Guards.”

Four guards ran into the room, guns pointed at Sung.

Sung closed the elevator doors. He kept jamming the close button over and over while he had his core expel some of its energy.

When the elevator doors finally opened, a burst of blue energy was released into the room.

As the energy continued to flow, Havve's eyes began to flicker.

Sung was able to easily dispatch the guards with a fancy combination of high kicks.

The Head looked mildly annoyed. “Ah.8p-3 come online.” From the ceiling, a robot was lowered, who looked eerily like Havve Hogan. “8p-3, dispatch the guest.”  
8p-3 looked like what Havve was possibly supposed to look like before he broke down. Clean white steel wrapped around his exterior, no black showing. Its red eyes landed on Sung and it lunged at him.

Sung was barely able to dodge the new robot. While Havve had a decent repair job, 8p-3 was Havve at his prime, an efficient killing machine.

8p-3 got up and swung its mighty fist, hitting Sung in the cheek and knocking him to the ground.

He touched his cheek, it was bleeding worse than expected. As the new robot came closer, Sung saw the spikes on its knuckles.

“Aw badass, ROLL!”

He barely missed the spiked knuckles connecting with him again, with 8p-3 leaving a fist shaped impression in the floor.

It turned and saw a chair hurtling towards its face.

And then another.

It was mildly annoying.

“Dude, you can't keep taking chairs to the face like this! You have to go down eventually! Like now!”

8p-3 caught the next chair and hurled it back at Sung.

“aw stupid buttface...” Sung groaned.

“Just kill him already.” The Head muttered.

Sung turned towards the voice.

“Oh shit guy I forgot you were here!” Sung scrambled towards him and positioned himself behind the Head. 8p-3 stopped and stared at him.

“Hey boss guy...” Sung had his arm wrapped around the Head's neck and was speaking directly in his ear. “...what's it doing now?”

The Head grimaced. "He's analyzing ways to kill you without harming me." 

"Oh! That sucks! How do I make him not do that?"

"Even if that was possible, why would I tell you?"

"I dunno man! I'm stressin out a little bit!" Sung knocked on the display case behind him. "Havve, ol buddy, ol pal! I'm not mad at you disappearing, but I could really use your help right now!"

Havve's eyes blinked once.

The Head chuckled. "He's blinks every once in a while, usually with an electrical surge, like whatever your chest is doing."

Sung looked at his chest the best as he could, with the old man pressing against it. The Device's external energy output had slowed because Sung hadn't been focusing. "oh yeah, I almost forgot about that... ok ok ok what to do..."

8p-3 dinged, and began to march towards Sung.

"He figured it out." The Head said.

"Shit shit shit ALRIGHT FINE! TAKE THIS"

8p-3 paused momentarily before seeing Sung pick up The Head and kicking him straight towards him. 8p-3 scrambled to catch him safely while Sung pressed himself against the glass. The Device began to release a surge of blue energy, seeping through the glass and into the slumbering form of Havve Hogan.

"C'mon man, c'mon I need you!" Sung pleaded, staring into the dim robotic eyes.

From behind, 8p-3 had made his way to Sung and was preparing to shove it's fist through the back of his head when the glass case in front of him had shattered. Sung turned around and saw that Havve had tackled 8p-3, and knelt on it's chest, socking it repeatedly.

"WHAT." The Head yelled.

"YES HAVVE YOU DRAMATIC BASTARD!" Sung yelled while running to help his friend.

"GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN. HELP ME KILL THIS." Havve said without looking away from 8p-3.

"Yeah! How do we do that?" Sung said, kicking 8p-3 in the head.

"DON'T KNOW. IT'S STRONGER THAN ME"

"Well that's a problem, keep hitting it?" Sung asked, while hitting it.

"KEEP HITTING IT."

"No no no!" The Head yelled. "8p-3! Obliterate them!"

A voice finally echoed from inside the robot. "Collateral Damage Protocols Prevent Me From Doing So."

"Ignore those protocols! Destroy them!"

"Understood" 8p-3 grabbed Havve's wrists and threw him to the ground.

"Hey! Bad Ro-" Sung caught an elbow to the face that shut him up.

8p-3 knelt on Havve's chest and raised his fists. When he brought them down, the floor beneath them crumbled.

Sung tumbled through the air and hit the next floor with a thud.

"agh, what the hell... auck!" Sung was lifted by his neck to see the uncaring face of 8p-3 before him.

"oh. Hey man, what's up?"

8p-3 stared back.

"Cool. What happened to the boss guy?"

"Dead."

"Huh, ok. Havve?"

"Unknown. Presumed to be further down."

Sung looked over and saw a hole in the floor that they were on.

"Cool. Hey, why are we talking now? You didn't seem very talkative earlier. Y'know, when you were trying to kill me and everything."

"Your Chest Produces An Incredible Amount Of Energy. Harnessing It Could Be Beneficial To Me."

"Man, why is it that everyone wants me for my body, not my personaliTEEEeeee" The hand around Sung's neck got tighter.

8p-3 pressed his other hand to The Device. Even behind Sung's protective armor, it felt warm.

"haack... you... gcck.. don't... want... hck... do that." Sung sputtered.

8p-3 loosened his grip around Sung's throat.

"How Do You Handle Such Power?"

"ahhh... The Cone's not just a fashion statement."

In a second, Sung's Cone was ripped off, and he finally took in his surroundings. The first thing that hit him was the bright wasteland sun, no visor to block it out. Then he realized that the floor they were on was now the building's new roof. The walls that had surrounded them had mostly crumbled down, leaving the wide expanse of the wasteland visible in all directions. Miles of dusty brown surrounded the black tower that jutted abruptly from it. Directly in front of him was 8p-3. He could be mistaken for Havve at a distance, but up close, he was smoother, cleaner, but at the same time, designed to inflict more pain. The years of wear and tear had dulled Havve down; a prick from one of 8p-3 spikes would draw blood. The robot tilted its head, eyes burrowing into Sung as he began to emit a faint blue glow.

Sung reached up and removed 8p-3’s hand from his neck. The robot stepped back.

“You see...” Sung stepped towards the robot “...the cone is a power dampener. Without it, Me and my prismatic core would melt the universe with one high kick.” He knelt over and picked his cone up. “But because I’ve worn this thing for a couple decades, The Device needs some time to get back to its universe melting state.”

8p-3’s eyes dimmed. “But It Has Enough Energy To Destroy Me.”

Sung looked awkwardly towards the ground. “Well, yeah, but I dunno... I was never really a killer unless the situation called for it..”

“It Is Simple. I Stand Against You And Your Friend. You Hold The Power To Stop Me. So You Will Stop Me.” 8p-3 knelt before the glowing doctor.

“Oh. You sure about this?”

“If I Was Not Certain To Lose, I Would Be Attempting To Murder You And Steal The Core.”

“Ah. Well see ya around nerd.”

“Do Not Patronize Me.”

8p-3 felt a warmth encompass him, and then nothing at all.

Havve climbed back up to the top floor, and saw an unmasked Sung standing next to a puddle of liquefied metal. Sung turned and saw his friend staring at him.

“Oh hey Havve! I, uh, took care of the robot.”

“YOU’RE NOT WEARING THE CONE.”

“Oh yeah, he...” Sung gestured towards the metal puddle next to him “...took it off. Looks like he made a mistake, huh?”

Havve walked to his best friend. “I HAVEN’T SEEN YOUR FACE SINCE I PUT THAT CORE IN.” Havve looked Sung in the eye.

“Oh well, yeah, kinda need to keep this thing on y'know?”

“PUT IT BACK ON, I'M OVER THIS. I'D RATHER THE UNIVERSE NOT MELT, EVEN IF I DON'T GET TO LOOK AT YOUR MEDIOCRE FACE.”

“Ah, and I thought we were having a moment!” Sung reattached his cone to his head, dimming the light of the outside world once more.

“I DIDN'T.”

“Pfft, so what now Havve? We continue Operation: Groove Crusaders?”

“WELL, I MAY HAVE BENEFICIAL NEWS.”

Sung bounced with excitement. “Oooh my favorite type!”

“I HEARD THE HIRE UPS DISCUSSING A HERMIT WHO WAS TRYING TO GET OFF WORLD TO A MORE HOSPITABLE LOCATION.”

“...do you know anything more?”

“OF COURSE I KNOW MORE. I KNOW HOW TO GET TO HIM.”

“Is that it?”

“THAT'S IT.”

“Welp...” Sung wrapped his arm around Havve’s shoulders. “...let's go find Phobos.”


	2. The Hermit

Sung and Havve rode for days through the wasteland looking for their former bandmate. Through the heat and the dust they searched for Lord Phobos until they came upon a bunker within the dirt. 

“Havve? Is that it?” Sung asked.

“ACCORDING TO THE HIGHER UPS, YES.” Havve said. “THEY WERE DISCUSSING POSSIBLE NEW RESOURCES TO HARVEST. RUMORS HAD IT THAT THERE WAS A HERMIT ATTEMPTING TO GET OFF WORLD.” Havve said.

“And you’re sure that’s Phobos?” Sung questioned.

“WELL HE IS THE ONLY ONE ON EARTH BESIDES US WHO’S CAPABLE OF SOMETHING LIKE THIS.” Havve explained.

“What about Meouch?”

“SERIOUSLY.” Havve would have closed his eyes if he could. “YOU THINK MEOUCH WOULD PUT EFFORT INTO SOMETHING LIKE THIS?”

“Yeah, you got a point, but-”

BANG!!!

From the bunker in front of them, a figure emerged, shotgun drawn at Sung and Havve. They had a torn reddish jumpsuit, and a distinct once golden helmet.

Phobos spoke. “What do you two want?”

Sung was flabbergasted. “P-Phobos? I haven’t heard you speak before? Your oath?”

Phobos stepped closer, lowering his gun. “What good did that oath ever do anyone?”

“But? What about-”

“MAYBE TELL HIM WHY WE’RE HERE SUNG.” Havve interrupted.

“No.” Phobos interjected. “How about you to tell me, Havve? You were always the most logical of us.”

“Hey! I was the leader though!” Sung spoke up.

Phobos coldly stared at Sung. “Was. Things have obviously changed, right? Havve?”

“AH. SUNG WANTS TO GET THE BAND BACK TOGETHER.”

Phobos sighed. “Of course he does. I’m surprised it took him this long to come asking. Alright Sung, why do you want to get us back together now?

Sung perked up a little. “Oh! It’s cause I believe we could help out the denizens of Earth! And we could probably get Earth back to her former glory!”

“Help? Help like we did last time? By going around and playing music?” Phobos scoffed.

Sung sunk back down. “Well in part, but! I was hoping to finally become the Groove Crusaders!”

“WE HAVE BEEN GOING AROUND AND HELPING PEOPLE.” Havve added.

“What is your stake in this Havve?” Phobos asked.

“WHAT?”

“Yes, you, Havve Hogan, killer robot. Why are you still bumming around with Sung? You could've gone off on your own, made something of yourself!”

“YES. BUT. SUNG MADE ME... ME. I OWE HIM.” Havve seemed nervous.

“And we’re best buds, right Havve?” Sung asked, noting Havve’s tone.

“YES. OF COURSE. THAT TOO.”

“Huh. Alright, you wanna see what I’ve been working on?” Phobos asked Havve.

“Yeah, sure let’s go!” Sung butted in.

“YES. LET’S.”

Phobos led the way back to his bunker, protected by a giant steel door. The door hissed open, and the three of them descended down a flight of stairs that led to the main workshop. The room was a mess, tools scattered around on shelves and on the floor. Drawers hung open revealing blueprints to various sci-fi type stuff. But in the center of the room was TWRP’s old space faring ship, currently going under repairs.

“Woah! I haven’t seen this girl in years! Phobos! You’ve taken great care if her, considering the circumstances.” Sung waved his hand to signify the years of apocalypse that had happened.

“Yeah, I’ve been trying to get off world for years now. I’ve worked on nothing else all this time. And now... and now, I’m so close!” Phobos looked up to the roof of the workshop.

“Where would you go?” Sung asked.

“There’s a Martian moon I could live on in isolation. Without civilization, I won’t have to watch another people go extinct. The first step is to get off this godforsaken rock.”

“Phobos!” Sung gasped.

“What? You think I wanted to see another planet die, Sung? To see another people go extinct? To relive the greatest tragedy of my life?” Phobos unconsciously reached for the gun at his waist.

“Phobos, I understand this is hard-”

“No you don’t Sung! You’ve always had these stupid optimistic ideas that could never work in the real world! And look where it got us, you, you-”

“PHOBOS.”

Until then, Havve had stayed silent, staring at the ship in front of him.

“DO YOU WANT TO TALK?” He glanced at Sung. “ALONE?”

“...yes.”

“WILL YOU BE OK HERE SUNG?”

“Yeah, I guess...” Sung said dejectedly.

“WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.”

Havve and Phobos walked out, leaving Sung with his thoughts.

“WHAT IS YOUR GOAL HERE PHOBOS?”

“To get off this planet. To have my people survive another day.”

“BUT YOU CAN DO THAT HERE.”

“Yeah, barely. It’s not fun scrounging for food and water, Havve.”

“YES BUT, YOU USED TO LOVE EARTH TOO.”

“Used too. Back when it was beautiful. Before it was trying to kill me alongside humanity.”

“YOU EXAGGERATE.” 

“Do I? In a few years, the atmosphere will be so toxic, I’ll have to leave this respirator on full time. Unless I leave.”

“IT DOESN’T HAVE TO COME TO THAT.”

“Oh yeah, we’re going to music the world back to life?”

“...SUNG IS STILL A LITTLE NAIVE.” 

“A little? He’s one of the oldest beings in the universe, and he’s barely learned anything.”

“THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN IGNORANCE AND HAVING IDEALS. SUNG IS NOT IGNORANT.”

“Why do you keep sticking up for him? You could leave him Havve! You could...” Phobos paused. “You could help me with the ship. We could get off planet. A new start for both of us! No more Groove Crusaders, no more Earth, no more TWRP! We could do whatever we wanted Havve! Without the cone!”

“PHOBOS. LISTEN TO YOURSELF. YOU ACT LIKE HE’S NEVER DONE ANYTHING FOR US. HE MADE YOU THAT HELMET.”

“All to serve his own goals! You can’t have a guitarist who’s suffocating on stage!”

“HE CARES ABOUT US PHOBOS. HE CARES ABOUT YOU.”

“If he did, he’d want to me get off this shitball!”

“HE WANTS YOU TO STAY BECAUSE HE CARES ABOUT YOU. PHOBOS.”

“What.”

“IF YOU GO OFF IN ISOLATION, YOU WILL SELF DESTRUCT. YOU WILL LAST A YEAR TOPS AT BEST.”

Phobos snapped. “So what if I do, huh? At least all this bullshit will be over!”

“IF YOU ISOLATE YOURSELF, YOUR PEOPLE WILL DIE SOON. IF YOU STAY WITH US, YOU WILL SURVIVE. YOUR PEOPLE WILL SURVIVE.”

“...aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH YOU STUPID ROBOT!!!”

“YOU SAID I WAS THE LOGICAL ONE.”

“...shut up.”

Phobos sat down against the wall, and Havve sat next to him. After a few minutes of silence, Havve put his arm around Phobos.

“He understands things are different, right?”

“OF COURSE. BUT SOMEONE NEEDS TO STAY OPTIMISTIC FOR US, RIGHT?”

“Yeah, I guess...”

There was a loud clatter from the other room.

“WANT TO GO BACK?”

“Let’s go.”

As Havve and Phobos walked back into the room, they saw Sung looking at something in his hands. Sung turned and showed the object to Phobos. It was a license plate that said VANGELIS.

“Where’d you get this?” Sung asked.

“Oh, uh... I found, I found it.” Phobos mumbled.

“But this, this was at my house?” Sung prodded.

“Well, uh yeah, I saved it.” Phobos said.

“You cared!” Sung ran in for a hug and nearly tackled Phobos.

After nearly being knocked over, Phobos hugged back. “I guess I do.”

A cold looming figure joined the hug. “I LOVE YOU FOOLS.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND OF COURSE, THAT MARTIAN MOON WAS NAMED PHOBOS. WHAT A NARCISSIST.


	3. The Drug Lord

“So uh, where’d you guys get the truck?” Phobos asked.

“FOUND IT.” Havve responded, eyes not leaving the windshield.

“Well he’s not wrong, we were wandering around, and we found it abandoned, and then we fixed it and upgraded it!” Sung explained.

“Yeah, I can see that...” Phobos said, looking around Sung and Havve’s ride.

It was a beat up old pickup truck even before the apocalypse happened, and yet, it was somehow still working, partly due to its new owners. It still had its old chipping green paint, but it also now had badly spray painted flames on top of that. The roof had been raised so someone would stop complaining about their cone scraping against it. On top of the roof were solar panels that had wires running down into the hood. The wires were duct taped down to the car after an incident where someone got too close to a tree got them torn off.

“So Phobs, you’ve been keeping tabs on Meouch?” Sung asked.

“Out of necessity, yes.”

“NECESSITY?”

“Yeah, I’ve had too many encounters with his... ‘associates’ to not figure out what was happening.”

“Oh he made new friends?”

“Wouldn’t call them that...”

“HOW HAVE YOU ENCOUNTERED THESE ASSOCIATES?”

“We both search ruins for similar things. Only difference is I do it myself, while he sends his goons.” Phobos said.

“Goons? What is he, a mob boss?”

“He’s close enough to one.”

“AM I SUPPOSED TO KEEP GOING DOWN THIS ROAD?”

“Yeah we’re close, just keep going.”

“Phobos...” Sung locked visors with Phobos “...what has Meouch been doing?”

“You’re smart Sung, you can figure it out.”

“HA.”

“Shut it Havve.” Sung pushed his shoulder.

“Think, what was he doing before you recruited us?”

Before Sung could answer, everyone was hit with a noise that shook them to their core. It did not let up.

“I THINK WE’RE HERE.”

Sung leaned towards the windshield. “Oh no...”

Phobos crossed his arms. “Yeah, he’s dealing funk again.” 

Havve parked the truck and everyone got out. Sung immediately began approaching what used to be a concert hall and was grabbed by Phobos.

“Hey Sung, let’s stay down for the moment, not all of have all powerful cores, right?”

“What’s wrong now?” Sung asked, irritation making its way into his voice.

Phobos looked at the building. “Havve?”

“SIX VISIBLE GUARDS. TWO NEXT TO THE DOOR, FOUR ON THE ROOF.”

“Yeah, so what? It’s not like their going to shoot us! We’re friends with their boss! Actually...” Sung began to get back up.

“Havve grab what you can!” Phobos panicked and reached for his gun.

“I NEED ONE KNIFE AT MOST.” Havve flexed his nonexistent biceps.

“Hey guys!!! Guardos!!!” Sung yelled while running at the building. Instantly, six guns were drawn on him. One of the door guards approached him. He was covered in patchwork clothing and makeshift armor that was falling apart. His eyes were sunken in, and his skin seemed to hang off his skull. The weirdest thing was his ears, which seemed to be broken? The top was flopped over, like the cartilage had given up.

“What do you want?” The guard asked, gun pointed at Sung’s chest.

“We are here...” Sung gestured to Phobos and Havve behind him, who were poorly attempting to seem inconspicuous. “...to party with your boss!” He paused. “Your boss is Meouch right?”

The guard nodded to the other door guard, who went inside. “So Cone Man, Robot, and the hermit who’s been killin’ us wants to come in and see Meouch?”

Sung was taken off guard. “Killing?”

The guard chuckled. “Yeah, ol’ red over there. We’ve ran into each other a few times.”

Sung whirled around. “Phobos!” He felt a gun press against his back.

“How about you and your friends come in now?” More guards came out and immediately flanked the trio. All of their ears were deformed in some way.

The inside of the building was even more disgusting than the outside. Lightbulbs flickered dimly, barely showing what you were stepping in. The walls had holes of various sizes knocked in them, any wallpaper being hastily torn away. The carpet had so many rips, it probably counted as multiple carpets at this point. So many beer bottles littered the floor, a path had to be cut through them. And the stains! They were everywhere, and most of them had a suspicious origin. Throughout the building, you could hear bass, no matter where you were.

As they were being marched down the halls, Sung turned to Phobos. “You’ve been killing these guys?” He hissed.

“What do you think I had to do during those encounters? It’s not like they left me much choice!”

“Yeah but-”

Phobos snapped. “I did what I had to Sung!”

Havve leaned over to join the conversation. “IF WE DON’T FIGURE SOMETHING OUT, WE WILL BE KILLED.”

Phobos sighed. “At least they didn’t take my gun.”

“WE ARE CRITICALLY OUTNUMBERED IN A SMALL CONFINED SPACE. WE DON’T WANT TO GET TO POINT WHERE WE NEED TO USE OUR WEAPONS. SUNG I GRABBED YOUR NUNCHUCKS. YOU FORGOT THEM IN YOUR RUSH TO GET US KILLED.”

“Thanks, Havve.”

“OF COURSE IDIOT.”

As they walked, the strums of a bass got stronger and stronger. It was a hell of a solo.

The leading guard turned to them. “You ready to meet the boss cat?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be...” Phobos mumbled.

The doors opened and the trio walked in. Sitting on stage in a makeshift throne was a lion ending his deafening solo. Beside him were dozens of glass jars filled with what looked like a crystalline liquid. Meouch hadn’t changed much, with the exception of more grime and a few pounds. As he finished, Meouch finally looked up at the trio.

“S’uh dudes?”

“Meouch! Long time no see!” Sung began walking towards him before being held back by Havve.

“Man, Sung, apocalypse hasn’t got you down much huh?”

“You know nothing keeps me down!”

“So whatcha guys in for? You want some funk?” At the mention of funk, Phobos tensed up.

“Well, maybe in the way we used to make it!” Sung replied.

“Really? You guys came all this way to try to get me to join TWRP again?” Meouch began to get up from his throne.

“Well, yes and no-”

“Oh, your little plan B then! I’m good. Got enough funk business rolling in to last me the rest of my days.” 

Phobos finally spoke. “You can’t keep making funk like this.”

Meouch walked to the end of the stage. “Oh? Says who?”

“Says me.” Phobos walked forward to meet him.

“Hey Phobos...” Sung popped up awkwardly. “We just met up again, let’s not do anything hasty.”

“No.” Meouch silenced Sung. “Let “Lord” Phobos talk.”

“If you keep making funk like this...” Phobos got in Meouch’s face, a dirty unkempt thing. “...I will kill you myself.”

“Bold words from someone who couldn’t do it last time.”

Phobos reached for his gun.

BANG.

Thunk.

Havve had tackled Phobos while Sung grabbed Meouch off the stage. Rubble rained down from the ceiling from a newly installed skylight.

“SAY YOU ARE SORRY.”

“Get off me Havve!” Phobos struggled under Havve’s weight.

“You ok Meouch?” Sung asked.

Meouch glared at Phobos. “Yeah I’m fine.” He walked towards him. “Let him up Hogan.”

Havve stared back at him. “WHY.”

“Because I said so shitbag!” Meouch snapped.

“EXCUSE ME COMMANDER?”

“It’s Emperor now!”

Sung positioned himself between the trio. “Ok, tensions are high, how about we all just calm down and-”

“Outta way Sung.”

“No, not yet, just-”

“Do you know how many of my guys he’s killed?!?” Meouch yelled.

“I’ve heard that it was a couple and that’s not good, but-”

“82. 82 Sung! 82 people who were just mindin’ their own business!”

“Bullshit!” Havve had let Phobos up, but was still holding him back by his arms. “You sent some of those guys directly to my bunker!”

“Some! Not all!” Meouch roared.

“You think I’m just gonna let you destroy another world?”

“I’ve learned since then!”

“Woah, woah, woah. No one’s destroying any worlds. Right guys?” Sung asked.

“He already has.” Phobos growled.

“How much worse could this shitball get anyways?”

“So. Much. Worse.”

“Outta my way Sung.”

“No! Not until you too calm down!”

“He’s going to destroy the planet like this Sung.”

“Fine!” Meouch climbed back on stage. “You wanna see how dangerous my funk is?” He got back on stage. “Here! Take it!” He threw the jar at them.

BRRUUUUUMMM.

As the glass jar shattered, the deafening sound of a bass filled the room. The trio was knocked back as guards began to enter the room.

“Finally you guys show up! Take em out of here!” Meouch roared.

“Sung, Havve, can you hold them off?” 

“OF COURSE.”

“I guess?”

“Good.” Phobos looked to Meouch. “I'm going to deal with the lion.”

As Havve and Sung fought off the incoming guards, Meouch watched as Phobos approached his throne.

“What now Phobos? You gonna to try and kill me again? For like, the third time?”

“No. I’m better than that.”

“Ooooh so noble! Luckily, I'm not!” Meouch pulled out a small pistol.

Phobos paused for a second and examined the gun.

“That's a fake gun.”

“What? No it's not!”

“Shoot me then!”

“Fine! I will!”

“Do it!”

“AAAAAAAHHH"

BANG!

A small flag shot out of Meouch’s gun.

“Oh what? How'd that happen?” Meouch tried to act surprised and failed.

Phobos continued to approach him. Meouch tripped and gazed up at the looming helmet. “You know I could end you, right? Me, Sung and Havve could easily destroy everything you've built. And you would be left with nothing. Even as you work to ruin the planet with funk, we choose kindness, and see all the potential you have.” Phobos stuck out his hand. “Chose wisely Meouch. You've already destroyed my world, don’t make me destroy yours.”

Meouch was silent. The sounds of fighting seemed to be nonexistent as he gazed into Phobos’ visor.

“Hey guys!” Meouch yelled, not taking his eyes off Phobos.

Everyone froze. Sung slowly lowered his foot to the ground and Havve let go of the unfortunate soul he held. Dozens of guns were holstered.

“What's up boss?” A voice yelled from the crowd.

“These are friends, stop fighting.” Meouch looked at Phobos for any sign of emotion. He stuck his hand out. “God, did you write that down before you got here?

Phobos helped Meouch up. “Shut up, I was about to kill you."

“I'll be honest! You had me worried for a second!”

“You looked more than worried, stupid.”

Another voice came out from the crowd. “ARE YOU TWO GOING TO KISS OR SOMETHING?”

Two voices shouted back in unison. “Shut up Havve!” One continued and said “I could do better anyways.”

One of the thugs from the crowd approached Meouch. “So what the fuck are we going to do now?”

“Um, I dunno. Hey Doc! Whyja come out here again?” Meouch yelled.

“Groove Crusading!” Sung yelled back.

“That's right! You guys bring your shit?”

“Fuck yeah! It’s in the truck!”

“Sweet!” Meouch addressed the whole crowd. “Alright boys and girls, give us about...” Meouch looked to Havve and gestured vaguely at the stage.

“TWO HOURS AT BEST.” Havve answered his question.

“Four hours and we'll give you the best damn funk you've ever heard!” The crowd roared.

“I'll go grab everything!” Sung said and raced out the door. 

“DON’T TOUCH MY DRUMS.” Havve said, following him out the door.

Meouch looked to Phobos. “Hey man, we good?”

Phobos shrugged. “For the moment.”

“For what its worth, I am sorry. For everything.” Meouch looked down

Phobos put his hand on his shoulder. “Hey. Rock and roll best friends?”

Meouch went in for a hug. “Rock and roll best friends.”

“I forgive you.”

Around five hours later, the four of them were all gathered on stage.

“Alright everyone, you got a special treat tonight!” Meouch said into his mic. “We are no longer Teen Wolf RolePlay! What are we now Doctor Sung?”

“I do believe Commander, that Song Number One will answer that question. Now, Meouch, do you have anything special to say about Song Number Four?”

“According to my notes Doc, Song Number One, GOES OUT TO ALL THE LADIES HERE TONIGHT!!!”

The crowd screamed, especially the ladies.

BRREUUUUM

“We are Groove Crusaders!”

**Author's Note:**

> FUN FACT: I NAMED THE ROBOT 8p-3 BECAUSE IF YOU SAY IT WRONG ENOUGH, IT KINDA SOUNDS LIKE APATHY!


End file.
